Couples therapy resolves many internal conflicts.
There is no official data, but experts indicate that couples therapy usually benefits those who decide to do it, leaving it stronger.
For Manuel and his wife Ana, therapy was the impetus to continue their life together
Psychologist Aurora López points out that thanks to couples therapy you can know what is wrong in the relationship and find the necessary tools to face new challenges.
Talk to a psychologist either therapist to resolve what is not working in your life can become a very enriching experience, especially if we talk about couple therapy. It is known from different studies that its percentage of success ranges between 70-80%. The experts consulted affirm that part of his victory derives from the implication of both members of the couple. This and more data along with the testimonies of three couples who found this therapy helpful, below.
Thanks to couples therapy you can address what is not going well in the relationship. The conviction and the desire in the process of resolving conflicts will be decisive for everything to flow in the right direction. If not, tell Clara, 56, that in just a few months she went through several complicated situations on a personal and work level and felt overwhelmed. “I was not able to adequately assimilate certain unforeseen events and this led to anxiety”explains before admitting that, as a result of his situation, her husband found himself alone to face many other things and instead of feeling their support, he only perceived complaints about what he was forced to do.
A lot to cover
He adds that, in addition, they stopped having affectionate approaches and sexual and were hardly sincere with each other. This Early Childhood Education teacher says she requested professional help half a year ago. “I’m going to a psychologist to resolve some things in my life and together with my husband we go to couples therapy because we know that we are going through a rough patch and We need helpIn fact, we are already seeing good results,” he adds.
Clara appears confident about her future. We know that more and more people are deciding to go to couples therapy, among others. reasons to improve in issues related to raising children, those of an emotional-sexual nature or family problems.
Not available official data that allude to the couples who attend therapy in our country every year. However, some professionals emphasize that it is a somewhat small number given that in Spain, according to data from a study prepared by the CEU Demographic Observatory, approximately the 50% of marriages: one in eight couples does so in the first seven years of marriage; and one in five, in the top 10.
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Thanks to another study in which five Spanish couples participated, giving its name to the documentary ‘Couples Therapy’, thanks to the research carried out by the University of Navarra in collaboration with the Brigham Young University in the United States, two relevant benefits in the couple.
The psychologist Elisa Múgica, producer and scriptwriter of the work, assures that thanks to the therapy there is a communication closest in the men and, especially in the womena improvement in mental health. In this sense, the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy gives a very positive view of this procedure, stating in its surveys that three out of four couples who opted to work in therapy certify that thanks to it their bond was improved.
Lean on who loves you
“Thanks to couples therapy I see my wife again as the person I did not hesitate to choose 29 years ago for my entire life,” says Manuel, 58 years old.
The bricklayer says that two years ago they lost their son in a traffic accident and his wife he sank psychologically. “Instead of leaning on me, he just took medication and didn’t want to leave the house or bed. She didn’t want me around because she told me that her life was over,” says Manuel.
It was difficult for him to convince his wife Ana to go to therapy: “I saw in her eyes that she blamed me for no reason, I needed to blame tosomeone. “She blamed herself too.”
was missing trust between both of them and return to being the team they once were, although the lack of one of the members, whom they loved the most, weighed heavily. “Not only did she have to deal with it, our marriage was on the rocks and I needed to see that there was still some love left from her towards me,” he points out.
As noted, the therapy was the drive to continue with life and continue together as a married couple because running away prevented them from continuing. “We still have a lot of work left, but she already feels that, despite the pain and her absence, she can move forward,” she concludes.
Mutual respect
It is necessary to take care of mental health and it is not about one day to the next. Speaking with Ángela, 53 years old, one knows that wanting is power. “I started a relationship with a person who had many traumas and I felt like I couldn’t handle all that,” he shares.
This industrial engineer asked her partner to go to therapy together to be able to face a life together and to be given strategies to fit in a healthy way and better channel the emotions. “We were there for several years and my partner continues to go to therapy on his own when he has a low mood that he can’t resolve on his own,” she says.
Although, as mentioned, they have a lot to improve both, both individually and as a couple, think that they have improved a lot in terms of how the other party may feel and what they need. “Loving and respecting each other more is the big key,” she confirms.
The free disposition of both parties
Aurora López, psychologist, expert in couples therapy at Más Vida Psicologías, says that couples therapy is a space where:
- The relationship is analyzed and evaluatedespecially what you want to achieve, and the professional gives his opinion to the members of the couple and explains what areas are important to work on and how the meeting will be organized. line of intervention.
- The intervention phase begins with the couple: We work with tools, strategies and the professional intervenes to afford and manage their difficulties.
The professional indicates that it is normal for one of the two members of the pair to be more convinced and have more of themselves when carrying out the therapy. “Even so, it must be understood that the commitment of both parties is essential to achieve results. I always tell my couples that with commitment there is a lot of progress,” she says.
López affirms that couples therapy saves many relationships, since thanks to her each person:
- Understand what was wrong in your relationship and why and begin to discover missing tools to effectively manage life’s disagreements and challenges.
- You know more and learn to take care and take care of them and they build a team between the two. The biggest benefit here is the reconnect.
- Acquire the tools necessary to face future challenges.
When is it appropriate to seek professional help?
The figure of the psychologist makes conflicts more relative. Fátima Gallardo, a couples therapist, argues that sometimes people go to therapy later than they should. “The ideal would be to go in those first moments of fatigue, doubts, where we realize that the solution is not in our hands. Let’s avoid letting months and years pass with what generates us suffering”, he expresses.
Between the reasons why a couple can go to therapy, the expert identifies:
- Communication difficulties with constant fights.
- not speak for fear of arguing.
- Have the feeling of not feeling understood.
- Intimacy issues that make you feel rejection or doubts for our partner and creates distance.
- Difficulties in reaching agreements around educational tasks with children or at home.
- Situations of infidelity.
- Difficulties with extended family.
- Problems because the life project is developed in opposite directions.
- Doubts about whether to continue or notsince, if we are left alone with that, it can lead us to hasty decisions.
